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angry rant, commentary, poem of a sort, politics

The Ballad of Newt Gingrich and His South Carolina and Florida Klan Fans

English: Newt Gingrich at a political conferen...

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They’re mean, they’re white

They lust to fight

In England they’d be skinheads

They’re mugs, scuzz, bugs

And racist thugs

With hate inside their pinheads


And Gingrich is “appalled”

That someone would have called

Him out on all his crap

While the morons jeered and clapped

To have such nerve, such balls

Elicited catcalls

From illiterate “aw shucks-ers”

Fat Newtie’s fans – Ku Klux-ers


They hate Barack

Gee, what a shock

In a stronghold of The Klan

‘N If they could they would

String him up real good

He’s just some uppity nigger – not a man


And Gingrich soaks it in

The cheers, they make him grin

Each dumb adoring fan

With a yearning for The Klan

To return and ride again

Face masked, lit cross, and then

Drag the family out to see

What’s swinging from that tree


Be not misled

They lay in bed

These “fans” of “Speaker” Gingrich

That this darkie lives in

Their ‘Murrican “white” house gives ‘em

Twice their usual cooties, makes their skin itch


And Newt speaks in those “code” words

Food stamps”- those “what a load” words

And they cheer and stamp theyuh feets

If they could, they’d all wayuh sheets

And these clowns Newt makes his cash on

These rubes who cheer his ass on

These good ol’ boys who chew on

Theyuh chaw wanna get theyuh Ku on


He’s so like a used condom

With many demi monde, im-

Pressive – an adulterous vile scumster

Historian? Get real

He’s a conman with a spiel

Whose books should all be used to line our dumpsters


And Newt- the Klansman’s darling

Like them, hate-filled and snarling

The I-4 corridor wasteland

The meth fueled cruel base and

They’re his “God-fearing”half-wits

The single issue hypocrites

The issue bein’ that “nigger”

To them there’s nothin’ bigger


And if Newt’s not a racist

Just fans fires in places

Where he knows that it “plays” ‘n gains approval

That alone should be enough

To take him by his scruff

And toss him out into the street for trash removal


And Newt with indignation:

How DARE the intimation

That he would stoop to lobby

(Freddie Mac was just a hobby)

And the yahoo Klansmen SCREAM

(Newt is every Ku’s wet dream)

He’s our saviour they all swoon

He can rid us of this coon


Newt Gingrich you’re a cancer

And for you there’s just one answer

Cut you from the body politic post haste

Your place and perfect stage is

Upon the printed pages

Of Webster’s – to be found ‘neath “human waste”



© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.


35 thoughts on “The Ballad of Newt Gingrich and His South Carolina and Florida Klan Fans

  1. Reblogged this on Motley News and commented:
    If you have not checked out Barking in the Dark’s blog, please do so. A political satirical humor like no other. His writing will make you both laugh, then want to cry because of the harsh truth contained within.

    Posted by She speaks.... | January 26, 2012, 10:32 pm
  2. I love this ballad! It could be sung as a ballad or as a rap. (Though the rap version would reach many supporters of the Newtered One.)

    Posted by Ahmnodt Heare | January 26, 2012, 4:38 pm
  3. Another hit. If only your ballads could be read by the ‘masses.’ Caught the cancer comment heh. Truly the best rhyme/line (I’m a poet my feet show it…)
    ‘He’s so like a used condom
    With many demi monde, im-‘

    Wonderful, perfectly shocking, and so thorough a piece of truth. Nothing else I could add.
    Tony, as always, you hit it out of the park.

    +1, twitter and Press This

    Posted by Rachael Black | January 26, 2012, 12:18 am
  4. Reblogged this on Drayton's Gazette.

    Posted by V. Lyn | January 25, 2012, 4:44 am
  5. Perfect post. I love it so much I am taking the liberty to reblog it.

    Posted by V. Lyn | January 25, 2012, 4:43 am
  6. Reblogged this on Don in Massachusetts and commented:
    I strongly recommend this blog. Read the comments, especially the one by Caruso.

    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | January 25, 2012, 3:10 am
  7. At least when the Klan wore the white sheets they were identifiable. Now they’ve learned to wear suits, minimize the accent, justify their actions, hide behind politics and “blend in” while passing out the koolaid.Frightening.

    Posted by MJ, Nonstepmom | January 25, 2012, 12:13 am
  8. Tony,

    You’re absolutely right. Gringrich shamelessly speaks in code, understandable to every white southern racist. Food stamps, welfare queens, joblesssness, crime, etc. They all say to the electorate, “I hate ’em just as much as you, but I’ll bring back the old America, you know, with strict segregation.”

    Gringrich’s 2006 “Retention Agreement” with Freddie Mac is an astonishing document. Gingrich is referred to as a “Consultant,” not an historian or anything else. The entirety of his duties, for which he’s been paid a reported $1.6 million, are the following: “Consultant [Gingrich] will provide consulting and related services as requested by Freddie Mac’s Director.” That’s it!

    In my 38 years of practice, I’ve never seen anything like this. The agreement paid Gringrich $300,000/year for over 5 years — and with no duties. The agreement doesn’t say, for example, what services Gingrich was to provide, when he was to do so, how his pay was determined, or why he was retained. There’s no possible way to evaluate if he ever performed or breached.

    The truth is that, between 2005 and 2008, Feddie Mac and Fannie Mae were under seige by powerful conservatives, who wanted to strip them of funding and either curtail their lending authority or privatize them completely (they were each “Government Sponsored Organizations – GSOs). The problem was that Freddie and Fannie were undercutting the banks, because Freddie and Fannie could borrow at slightly lower interest rates due to the benefit of the Government’s “implicit” guaranty that their debts were 100% secure (as was borne out by the bailouts in 2008 under the Bush Administration).

    The private lenders wanted to avoid this competition and hired a number of prominent Republicans, including John McCain, to try to clip the wings of Freddie and Fannie. It was a huge fight inside the Beltway — but not in the “lame stream” media.

    Freddie and Fannie pulled out all the stops, including hiring Gingrich to convince conservative Republicans that they should back down in their demands to dismantle Freddie and Fannie — that is, that there was plenty of money for everyone, even with Freddie and Fannie in the mix. You can be assured that Gingrich knew just what to do, and subsequently, all efforts by the conservatives against Freddie and Fannie failed. (So did the mortgage security market, which took down half the economy with it; although Freddie and Fannie have paid off 100% of their debts to their lenders, as promised. I understand that the bailout to save them is estimated to be in the range of $150 billion, which could have financed another year of war in Afghanistan.)

    In any event, Gingrich was handsomely paid for his support of Freddie and Fannie, although their principals are still under criminal investigation and I believe several of the mid-level guys were recently indicted.

    When Romney called Gingrich an “influence peddler,” he was right on point. But where Gingrich comes from, he is more properly called a “grifter.”

    Keep up the good work.


    Posted by Caruso K9 | January 24, 2012, 9:36 pm
  9. Struck by it all but wow…”like a used condom” is genius.

    Posted by winsomebella | January 24, 2012, 5:17 pm
  10. I will agree with you on this one. This should make you happy. The emergence of Newt is scarey even to a Republican. Unfortunately, all the legit alternatives are just as bad. Romney? Ricky S? Looks like your guy is a shoe in for another 4. If the GOP had some balls and nominated my guy, it might be interesting. I think there are some folks on both sides that would vote for Ron Paul. There are plenty of Republicans the will not vote for Newt or Mitt and I don’t see the “Reagan Dems” going for them either.

    Posted by Tom | January 24, 2012, 2:27 pm
  11. Magnificent, as always. And “He’s so like a used condom” is such a perfect description! You have a gift of finding just the right words and descriptions.

    Posted by She speaks.... | January 24, 2012, 2:05 pm
  12. The vitriol is palpable. As always, well done!
    To me, scariest part of Newt is that he still occasionally makes excellent points.
    Unfortunately, all his baggage and ass-hattery comes with him.

    Of the current crop of repub candidates, he scares me the most.

    Posted by El Guapo | January 24, 2012, 1:47 pm
  13. You nailed it, Tony!

    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | January 24, 2012, 1:12 pm
  14. I’m all for one-man-one-vote…………above a certain IQ level. :)

    Posted by Single Malt Monkey | January 24, 2012, 7:45 am
  15. your ballad- nicely done
    Newt- blech

    Posted by Frugalistablog | January 24, 2012, 6:46 am


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