Fox News revealed just minutes ago that Trayvon Martin was a double agent for an as yet unnamed country in either the west or east….or maybe even the Middle East.
As ace Fox anchor Bill O’Reilly reports, “It has been discovered by our sources that allegedly George Zimmerman knew that Mr. Martin was probably a dangerous double agent, knew he was a possible threat to our very existence as a country, and had been following him for months. The other country involved besides the aforementioned unnamed country was another unnamed country, where Trayvon Martin was indoctrinated and taught the fine arts of spying. Our source – who, you understand, must remain anonymous, also told us that Mr. Martin had once visited a tattoo parlor, and had a closet full of hoodies.”
Fox reports that Mr. Martin “spoke seven languages and could spy in each one of them.” O’Reilly added that ‘”we have undisputed, incontrovertible, evidence – which, of course is under lock and key owing to it’s sensitive nature, and the fact that we here at Fox News do wish to take the feelings of the Martin family into consideration on this – but evidence that we think just may point to perhaps a distinct possibility that there might be a chance Mr. Martin maybe could have been acting as a possible undercover proxy agent for an as yet to be named alleged person of interest.’ Then, looking quite serious, he stared into the camera and said; “I’ll have all these incredibly unbelievable facts after this word from our sponsors.”
Sean Hannity also reported that Mr. Martin was “obsessed with that Commie feng shui and loved moving furniture around in people’s homes.” Hannity added “If I ever caught anyone, let alone a Commie Pinko, fenging – or shuiing – in my house it…” and here he paused dramatically, “… it would be… not good – as my boyfriend would be so upset.”
Later tonight the Fox TV special “George Zimmerman – Misunderstood Martyr: The Director’s Cut” hosted by Ann Coulter, will be aired in its entirety, including the never before seen footage shot during George’s time working with Mother Teresa in Africa.
THIS JUST IN: Fox News has learned that Trayvon Martin possibly could even have been a Triple Agent! Maybe.
© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012]. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
I just knew it was a mistake to cancel my subscription to faux news and the sun….damnit
LikeLike
so what? you can just make it up like they do. thanks for the comment Valentine. continue…
LikeLike
Jeez…. the stuff you miss when you don’t watch Fox.
LikeLike
yup. ya gotta watch Fox for the “real” news. thanks for the sly comment. continue…
LikeLike
Oh and despite your kind words towards FUX you’ve started a video binge on that commie seal loving Aussie-marrying bastage Ben Folds!
LikeLike
mea culpa. and also oops. continue…
LikeLike
Thanks! I was waiting for the real story to come out. I mean, there is no way that Zimmerman could have just stalked that boy because he didn’t like his “looks” and just shoot him for no other reason. Impossible. This is a MUCH better explanation. Thanks again!
LikeLike
you’re quite welcome Michelle, this makes as much sense as the “story” his lawyer and brother both tell. thanks…continue…
LikeLike
True. Very true.
LikeLike
George Zimmerman: giving morons everywhere a reason to unite.
Can’t wait for the spin they put on him to make him a martyr for the Rpeublican Party come November.
LikeLike
i am looking forward to the FBI report, and the EMT reports with great anticipation. thanks for the comment EG. what a country eh? continue…
LikeLike
You said it..yes he could have been an agent double crossing every country and planet but do you know he was an agent of the alien species from the galazy hooded?
LikeLike
wait…they’ll get to that too. thanks soma, i appreciate the comment. continue…
LikeLike
Nothing like Fox News looking at the world through rose colored glasses. go on…
p.s. what would we do without Fox News? just wondering
LikeLike
yeah…where would the morons get their lies from? oh yeah – limbaugh. thanks Don. continue…
LikeLike
See..the one day i completely ignore that flat screen in the breakroom at work that SCREAMS Fox from sunup to sunset I miss the breaking news.. Guess I’ll have to catch Nancy grace for the wrap-up..
You are priceless in your writing!!
LikeLike
thank you Lynne, i apprediate the kind words…i can just imagine the opinions in that break room. continue…
LikeLike
FINALLY! Fair and Unbalanced reporting on this travesty of a travesty (*citation needed).
Only the genius of Fux News would be brave enough to assign such a volatile story to their finest of reporters.
Tony, I and millions of uneducated Americans are grateful that your keen eye and ear have brought this continuing story to the forefront.
From this moment on we here at YoYo-Dyne will no longer allow Skittles in the vending machine, hoodies on any employe and/or visitor to the company (oh and we WILL search all employees homes for such contraband) and throw all of our lobbyist weight, er, personal weight, into this search for the real perpetrators.
Personally, I believe it was a front for Castro’s regime, funded by domestic terrorists such as the ACLU, NAACP, Sierra Club and naturally The Illuminati, All fueled by the Jew-run media.
Remember: Skittles don’t kill people, they just make it easier.
Oh, and can hardly wait to see Skeletor’s TV Special. We’re stocking up on Bud and Cheeze
Whiz for the block party being planned.
LikeLike
Rachael, thanks for the injection of elevated wit herein. i appreciate your keen mind and skewed (and skewered) take, on this, as on all things. very tart indeed. continue…
LikeLike
Barking…you already know what I think about your writing prowess and skill…trying hard not to hit the rewind remote…just imagine well done well done well done…for keeping your peeps on our toes.
LikeLike
thanks Jots, i do appreciate the kind words and support. continue…
LikeLike
And those Skittles the boy was holding….well, they could have been a bomb of some kind!!
LikeLike
Nicole Marie, and that ice tea was laced with arsenic to spill into the drinking water too. continue…
LikeLike
Hmm….I can see why OReilly & the rest are concerned. After experiencing a teen son, I know teen boys are fully capable of taking over the world. They are smarter than us, faster, stronger….
Those hoodies may have been rigged with all sorts of high-tech gadgetry for the devious purpose of music and internet access and who knows what kinds of shenanigans !
LikeLike
yes Janet, hoodies are the new weapon of choice. thanks for the witty comment. continue…
LikeLike