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commentary, poem of a sort, semi-angry rant, writing

The Ballad of the Republican Party Defined

To all of you who remain loyal 

The red "GOP" logo used by the party...

The red "GOP" logo used by the party for its website (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

To the GOP family of “royals”

And you’re not rich, or privileged, or fried,

And your news isn’t all Fox-i-fied

And you actually CAN think – and read

Love your wife, and your children, and need

A job, and some healthcare, and the knowledge

That, if they wish, your kids can go to college

And you’re spiritually, and socially, and environmentally inclined

And you’re still GOP –




They’re the party of the dumb

The scum and the numb

The bombers, the gun nuts, and the rich,

Of gluttons at the trough,

Of “I’ve-got-mine-fuck-off,”

The party made of hate, bait ‘n switch…


The numb take up the cause

Against women’s rights and laws

That would level the field – like regulations,

And their party fuels the fire,

Throwing kindling on the pyre,

By de-funding health, clean air, and education…


Yes, the right counts on the numb

Being hardened by the scrum

That they’ve put them in by cutting down their chances,

So the numb will hate and kill

Rendered bitter by this pill

And against all they themselves need for advances…


And the dumb think they see

Which shell hides the pea

In the three card monte game the right is playing,

For they’re tuned to Fox News,

They know what’s what, who’s whose,

Hey – it’s true if that’s what Fox is saying…


They sold a criminal and an oaf

Who fed rich folks our loaf

Whose war threw lives and treasure away,

And the dumb who can’t smell lies,

Who believe words not their eyes,

Would vote for Bush/Cheney to this day…


The scum are the worst –

These bombers who thirst

For the blood to give life to their drama,

Their hands on their triggers,

Especially for “niggers”

Like this uppity “darkie” Obama…


The GOP feeds them,

Cozens them, needs them,

They’re the GOP’s thunder and lightning,

If you’re looking for scum

Just look near the dumb,

The numb, and gun nuts of the right-wing…


The right slings propaganda

Through Fox lies and slander

Accusing all of what they do themselves,

As bullshit goes – friend

On a scale from one to ten

Fox News has always racked up solid twelves…


There’s not one right-wing plan

That has been pro-working man

Their only real concerns are war and tax,

Wars for their oil homies,

Lower tax for their rich cronies,

Who ride to make deposits on our backs…


And the scum-numb-dumb-gun nutters,

I.e., the right wings’ bread and butter,

Are the front line in the right wing’s fight to hold,

The only thing they care for

Their what, why, and wherefore,

Their “I Got-mine-so-fuck-you” pile of gold…


So they sling blood red meat –

And the scum, numb, dumb, eat

It up, gay and women’s rights, prayer – while winking,

As the base eats like a horse,

And the right thinks “of course,”

Knowing scum, numb, dumb, are hard of thinking…


So here’s the definition

Of the Republican position

That they have long held re the working class,

Their position goes like this;

They will make a fist

And while we bend o’er they’ll shove it up our ass.




© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.



About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.


32 thoughts on “The Ballad of the Republican Party Defined

  1. Fantastic.


    Posted by Lorre | April 18, 2012, 6:50 pm
  2. Eloquent angry and true. Well said, and said where not enough others will either.
    Even worse is that the scam becomes reality by a generation coming up that has been raised on Fucked News and never knew it was a setup to begin with.


    Posted by El Guapo | April 13, 2012, 8:21 pm
  3. Well Tony, I say your “song” just about covers it all.. now if only we can get the PTA to allow us to teach this to our young we might (I stress the word “might”) be able to break this Right-Wing, Republican-stuck in yesteryear mindset..
    another winner!!

    Post Script- Let’s get Neil Diamond to sing this at the next Super Bowl?


    Posted by free penny press | April 13, 2012, 1:05 pm
  4. Republicans scare me. The worry is, if the Right wins and with the Right in here, off we go a-trotting hand in hand looking for some poor nation to play a war game in. It’s not as if you need us. You don’t – but we like to be friends with the bully in the school yard.


    Posted by Single Malt Monkey | April 13, 2012, 7:19 am
  5. Wikipedia needs to point to this posting for the definition of “conservative” and “republican party.” Standing ovation! Well done, Tony!!!


    Posted by She speaks.... | April 13, 2012, 4:03 am
  6. I want to print these off and leave them for the low info voters to read. As if they would understand.


    Posted by lisahgolden | April 13, 2012, 3:02 am
  7. Now, can you put that to music (country or bluegrass). I assure you some azzhat will actually start singing it without really paying attention to the words. Then it will become the anthem of the Tea Party movement, soon that idiot female poser Sarah Painlin will take it up and she and her daughter will pole dance to it will waving the Stars and Bars and wearing American Flag Pasties and matching g-strings.


    Posted by valentine logar | April 12, 2012, 11:44 pm
  8. Voting for the Republican Party is the same rationale as buying a lottery ticket. Except the odds are even worse.


    Posted by Sam Flowers | April 12, 2012, 9:20 pm
  9. The Republicans love war(s), but when it comes to social causes, then its fuck off people, go fend for yourself. Good post. go on…


    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | April 12, 2012, 7:45 pm
  10. Tony, another gem. The last stanza re-caps it all -grin-. Don’t know how you do it but I’m DAMNED happy that you do.
    Meter and rage
    Intellect on the page
    News for the thinking
    Not the Kool-Aid Drinking

    Love it hon


    Posted by Rachael Black | April 12, 2012, 7:03 pm
  11. You tell em Tony…continue!


    Posted by TheConfirmationFiles | April 12, 2012, 3:22 pm
  12. Another great ballad Tony ! I knew many average working-class people who were struggling yet GOP – they were convinced that by supporting these ideals they would somehow someday achieve what the 1% had. I’m sure I looked pretty silly, all I could do in response was stare blankly, jaw open, waiting for the punch line….only to realize they were serious!


    Posted by MJ, Nonstepmom | April 12, 2012, 1:00 pm
  13. Just…yes. Yes. What are they thinking?? Where have all of the normal Republicans gone? The election of one, black Democrat was enough to create this despicable underworld of conservative, open-mike, hatemongering, awfulness that has risen up? Huh. So pointed and perfect as usual.


    Posted by Lilabell | April 12, 2012, 11:50 am
  14. Your ballads are choice, Tony 🙂

    I have never heard of this party. I don’t know how you keep up with politics, seriously. They’re all so same-same -none are down to earth enough for me. I just can’t keep up with them. But at least I can enjoy your ballads!


    Posted by WordsFallFromMyEyes | April 12, 2012, 10:32 am
  15. I really, really like that phrase, “hard of thinking.” It’s so true.


    Posted by Sparks In Shadow | April 12, 2012, 8:39 am
    • Re, i gotta say that’s a riff on a line from a seinfeld show…the valet stunk up his car and jerry says to elaine “do you smell that?” and she says “smell it? what am i – hard of smelling?” always makes me laugh, and if you’re gonna steal well, steal from the best eh? thanks hon. continue…


      Posted by barkinginthedark | April 13, 2012, 7:36 am

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