Contrary to the email you’ve received to date from various other members of our great Tea Party, my wife and I are both educated, well-informed university graduates, (me; Oral Roberts University Law School, she; Liberty University Law School).
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
As attorneys, and students of the Constitution of these United States, we can both vouchsafe that there is nothing in it that says “citizens shall receive free healthcare”, or “an education”, nor is there anything in said document that says that “the government shall regulate food safety”, and, the last time I checked the Constitution (yesterday evening in bed after bedtime prayers), I saw nothing, not one single word which stated that “there should be Federal Laws governing minimum wage”, or “child labor”, or “Medicare”, and/or “environmental protection”. Nor is there one single solitary word stating that the government should protect the safety of our food. Our founding fathers, in their divine wisdom, never once mentioned any of these over reaching programs which insult our intelligence. Any one who can’t remove a few rodent hairs from their tuna by themselves is either blind – or an idiot.
None of these items are mentioned in our Original Constitution as drawn up by some very smart men in 1787. And to top it all off, as our very own Rick Perry says in his must-read book “Fed Up”, there is the greatest “illegal Ponzi Scheme” of them all, Social Security, which as Perry says, “We have been forced to accept for more than 70 years!”
My good wife also agrees with me that women have entirely too much freedom in this country, and much too large a say in its running. And, except for Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann, should stay mainly in the kitchen and the nursery. (I do like to kid my good lady though about how she is a real good kisser in the bedroom.)
Also, neither my good wife nor I see anything in the original Constitution that says gays should have the same rights as everyone else. This is a joke but we are not laughing. All these programs that I have mentioned are nothing more than dangerous “Socialist” ideas which all vigilant patriotic people must, and should, guard against, lest they destroy our beloved country. We don’t need them, and we will repeal them when Mitt Romney – and whoever his running mate is – is elected.
So please, please vote, the quality of our lives depends on it.
© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Barking In The Dark 
Loved the update for this one. Goodness know I best be getting on with getting a man in the house so I can stop exercising all these freedoms reserved for Sarah and Michelle.
Red.
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Posted by Red | June 9, 2012, 5:59 pmEnjoy the hell out of your newest version of the ‘Educated Version’. Redefined after certain upholders of our moral liberties and family values have inexplicably dropped out of the race.
A Disgrace
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Posted by Rachael Black | June 7, 2012, 2:24 amthank you for noticing Rachael. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 9, 2012, 3:03 pmI’m pretty sure the Constitution doesn’t say that we should steal more money from us job-creatin’ rich folk only to turn around and waste it on fightin’ child slavery, or cleanin’ up dirty rivers, or other wasteful stuff. A smart man builds his house so that the bedroom is off the kitchen; that way a woman doesn’t have so far to walk in between the only two rooms she should spend much time in.
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Posted by trailertrashdeluxe | June 7, 2012, 1:49 amamen trailertrash…amen and hallelujah. we know where women belong at all times…too bad they’re on to us. very witty comment – thanks man. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 9, 2012, 3:05 pmOh lord, have you captured the true nature of this kind of thinking. I’m looking forward to when you pen the lyrics to the tune Uncertainty. That seems to be the song they’re singing these days.
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Posted by lisahgolden | June 5, 2012, 8:38 pmit’s too bad these people exist – even in my imagination. thanks Lisa h. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 9, 2012, 3:06 pmOMG right again,and i must say i have taken permission from my husband, just as a good wife should before she even opens her eyes or mouth, to comment here…
i would like to say sir you are 100% right we women have too much freedom.. good women stay within the confines of her home and does laundry and other chores..also Gays have no rights neither do women and kids,unless the kid is a boy
Thank you for spreading awareness 🙂
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Posted by Soma Mukherjee | June 5, 2012, 8:06 ami thank you Soma for recognizing your place, and the place of all women – and other lowly creatures. you are the kind of obedient wife any man would be proud to have walking 6 steps behind him. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 5, 2012, 3:48 pmMmmmm… and I’m sure they would describe themselves as “good Christians.” I can just visualize Jesus right now putting children to work 12 hours a day in a factory, or watching grandma die because she couldn’t go to a doctor for her pneumonia – she didn’t have any medical coverage whatsoever. Yup… so very Christian. Before these people open up their big mouths and preach to put gays and lesbians in a fenced area to die, I’d love to know if that’s what they think Jesus would do. I’m an atheist (as you know) and all the atheists I personally know have more compassion than many of these “leaders” in the news professing to be devout Christians.
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Posted by Michelle at Motley News | June 5, 2012, 4:35 amamen sista Michelle. if JC came down today they’d re-crucify him pronto. thanks from a fellow atheist. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 5, 2012, 3:56 pmTexas? Of course Texas, why wouldn’t they be in Texas. Where teen pregnancy is the second highest in the nation, second teen pregnancy the highest (we are the best). Abstinence only sex education works (Rick Perry says so). If it is dry it will kill the sperm (you do know what I mean by that right); and if you do it before marriage YOU WILL DIE (yes they still show that movie in our schools).
Texas?
Gad, this was great. Gotta run back to the bedroom now. My husband thinks I am a pretty good kisser, but only after I cook his dinner, clean his azz and clip his toenails.
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Posted by Valentine Logar | June 5, 2012, 4:29 amand don’t forget to genuflect before him as he is your lord and master. thanks Val, continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 5, 2012, 3:58 pmOral Roberts and Liberty U, eh? Can’t say enough about credentials like that …
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Posted by PiedType | June 5, 2012, 1:26 amyes…they are fully accredited morons. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 5, 2012, 3:59 pmHoly shit. Well, when you put it that way…. (well done.)
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Posted by Frugalistablog | June 5, 2012, 12:27 amthanks F., all you wimmens gotta know your place. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 5, 2012, 4:00 pmIf, and that’s a big IF, Romney became the next president, than we’re all in deep shit. go on…
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Posted by Don in Massachusetts | June 4, 2012, 11:33 pmYou’re not kidding there. He’s trying to carry on about how Massachusetts gained jobs – but keeps forgetting to mention that’s only because thousands moved out of the state.
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Posted by Michelle at Motley News | June 5, 2012, 4:36 ambig if? i dunno…they’re rigging it pretty good. thanks Don. continue…
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Posted by barkinginthedark | June 5, 2012, 4:01 pm