JOEY, IT’S YOUR OLD MAN…THIS IS THE SPEECH YOU GOTTA MAKE. KEEP HAMMERING IT…AND KEEP AT IT IN THE SECOND DEBATE ALSO!

Good evening America. Folks, you know me. You can look up my record. I’ll stand on it…I’m proud of it. Proud of what I’ve done for the working people of this country. But, tonight I’m gonna talk about this country’s biggest clown, and biggest loser.

I wanna talk about this loser Trump. This guy who I beat like a drum once, and who I’ll beat again. This punk who called G.I’s who gave their lives for us, “losers,” and “suckers.” This coward who made up a phony ailment to dodge the draft, called John McCain, a guy who never gave in to repeated torture, a war hero, called him a loser. This private bone-spurs has the nerve to call people who fought and died for their country, “losers.” My fellow Americans, this con-man is the sock-puppet of the Federalist Society, and mouthpiece of the Heritage Foundation. A B.S. artist who claims he doesn’t know anything about Project 2025. Project 2025, I hope you’ve all looked that up. You believe him? Really? This is a guy who’s lied to your faces over thirty-five thousand times. All verified. Look that up, too.

He’s a hot-shot businessman? Really? Don’t make me laugh, he’s the worst businessman in this country. This failure who pretended to be a businessman on reality TV tanked 15 businesses. Look that up. He failed at an an airline, a water company, a casino, a magazine, steaks, a mortgage company, travel, vodka, fragrances, there are more…and claimed bankruptcy six times! Bankruptcy, a nice way to get out of paying the people you owe money to. This is a loser who lost money with a casino! How do you do that? Have you ever heard of a casino losing money? This guy is the biggest loser we’ve ever seen. And, to boot, even before he declared bankruptcy, he stiffed the people who did the work for him.

There’s more. This is a weakling who downplayed the Covid pandemic because it made him look bad. His misplaced ego led to 400 thousand deaths on his watch. 400 thousand dead! And he’s never once apologized once to anyone, or comforted anyone,  who lost a loved one because of his fragile psyche.

This is a third-rate intellect who threatened colleges over releasing his grades. Gee, I wonder why? Is it because he graduated at the bottom of his class? At a school his father’s friend got him into. Penn U., where at least six ethics professors called for an investigation into the allegation that he paid someone to take the SAT test for him, and so was fraudulently admitted to Wharton. Sounds just like something this guy, this fraud, would do, doesn’t it? He’s a whiny loser, who’s father even then had to go with him to the interview. 

Trump is a snake-oil salesman who had to pay 21 Million dollars to the people he defrauded in his phony University scheme. He told reporters, he wanted to, “build a legacy as an educator.” I’ll wait until you stop laughing. The only thing this scam artist can “educate” us about is, how to swindle people out of their hard earned money. Something he’s been doing all his adult life. He’s been involved in over 5,000 lawsuits. 108 times this con man has been sued by workers who weren’t paid for their labor. He’s been sued at least 77 times for not paying his taxes. He’s been sued by tenants of his properties over 450 times. You try doing any of those things and see what happens.I’m not speaking to the people in Maga Nation now. We all know that no amount of information as to the frauds this guy has perpetrated for the last 50 years on ordinary working-class people like yourselves will penetrate their bubble. I’m speaking to you folks who can still reason, still accept facts.

This guy mocked a disabled reporter. Said he would “force the military to commit war crimes.” Insulted a gold-star family. Made many offensive comments about women over the years. In 1992, Trump told New York Magazine, “You have to treat ’em like…” well, I won’t say the word. In 2006, Trump said, “I sort of hope,” real estate markets tank. This, so he could take the opportunity to buy up cheap property and make a buck off of men and women who had just lost everything. Why would anyone in their right mind want a cruel vampire like this in the oval office? He wants to take $20 billion of existing federal dollars to fund private school voucher programs. The reality of this will mean that every dollar now spent on disadvantaged kids, English language learners and students with special needs would be redirected out of public education. If you do the math, his plan would harm 10 students for every 1 student it covers.

Pardon my French, but this guy is Putin’s ass-kisser who wants to abandon NATO. A fawning groupie who hasn’t met a dictator he doesn’t worship. A wannabe dictator himself.

My friends, this is a vindictive loser who hasn’t a clue how to do anything but wreak damage on ordinary people. We only exist for him to take advantage of. His entire life has been spent fleecing us. This is a guy who still refuses to accept that you voted him out. Who can’t believe you don’t think he’s fit to lead. A know-nothing who thinks he knows everything. A braggart, a whiner, a loser. The kind of big-mouth schoolyard bully we all know, who takes his ball when he loses and goes home, rather than play with others.

Do the research. Check out this crybaby. I am the President of this great country, and I will not let this con-man, this fraudster, this liar, this divider, bring us down. I need your help. Let’s get rid of this loser together. Let’s do the right thing. Together, we can preserve our beloved country’s standing as the world’s beacon of freedom.

My fellow Americans, not on my watch will we lose this most important fight. We can not give in to the greedy, selfish forces of autocracy who are trying to shred our Constitution. Those who want nothing more than to strip us of our rights – and even our vote. Every fawning Republican kissing the ring of this criminal must be voted out of office. They only care for power, and do not wish us well. We are merely in their way. Let this be our call to arms; Every Republican toady OUT!

My friends, may God bless our troops, and may God bless you, and our beautiful country. Thank you, stay well, and good night.

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