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The Ballad of Willard “Mitt” Romney or: Willard is a Perfect Name for Someone Who Enjoys the Company of *Rodents.

Mitt you’re a real fucking git

Mitt Romney - Caricature

Mitt Romney – Caricature (Photo credit: DonkeyHotey)

You’re a scumbag, and a douche bag large writ

You’re a self-serving spoiled piece of shit

As fake as a silicon tit

With one half  the wit of half-wit

With a laugh that’s a real counterfeit

A flip flopping smug hypocrite

An empty valise of a nit

So wholly, completely unfit

So lacking in any true grit

With “phony” in neon sign lit

On whatever fake vibe you emit

Not one hint of real – not one bit

You do know tho’ how to commit

Mayhem on a kid who won’t “fit”

With what you rich brats would permit

You’re all rich but you all ain’t worth spit

You’re what comes out when you squeeze a zit

And if I were casting a skit

I’d cast you as one clueless twit

And in that role you’d be a huge hit


*barking in the dark in no way intends to demean the noble order rodentia

by this comparison to Mitt and his ilk.



© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.


28 thoughts on “The Ballad of Willard “Mitt” Romney or: Willard is a Perfect Name for Someone Who Enjoys the Company of *Rodents.

  1. Mittens would disagree strenuously with this on a line by line basis . Of course, his reasons for disagreeing with each statement would all contradict each other, but still…
    (yeah, it sounded funnier in my head. Sorry)


    Posted by El Guapo | May 14, 2012, 11:21 pm
  2. Men like him make me very nervous.. very with a Capital “V”…
    another good rant to start my week off properly..


    Posted by free penny press | May 14, 2012, 12:10 pm
  3. …and if Mitt becomes IT
    we’re all in the shit
    so those with balls and grit
    do all you can to prevent it…

    I bow to your itist wit. 🙂


    Posted by Single Malt Monkey | May 14, 2012, 8:10 am
  4. Too funny! Once again, you have captured the true essence of the person of subject in your writing. This time, Mittens. Excellent!


    Posted by Michelle at Motley News | May 13, 2012, 6:10 am
  5. Tony you truly are the shit!
    So many rhymes that end in it
    Skewered with dark humor your scathing wit
    Who wouldn’t want that rodent on a spit?


    Posted by Rachael Black | May 13, 2012, 5:25 am
  6. You could send J-Z off the stage punked and in tears. You the man


    Posted by Valentine Logar | May 12, 2012, 5:31 pm
  7. In a perfect world, this asshole would not be running for president. Since it is not a perfect world, then wee have assholes like him running president and/or any other office, with the help of the so called media, skewing and pandering to these morons, and the Joe six packs of the world believe all the nonsense. Good post. go on…


    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | May 12, 2012, 12:45 pm
  8. Omg This made me laugh so hard….I am telling you Mitt Romney bit his tongue thousand times at least ( people say when some one curses you, you bite your tongue) 😆
    Oh man this is super fun 🙂
    That disclaimer saved you Tony….. rodents are very sensitive You know


    Posted by Soma Mukherjee | May 12, 2012, 7:22 am
  9. You still got it baby. How the hell did our politics get to this point? Devolution I guess. Great rhyme.


    Posted by Anonymous | May 12, 2012, 6:29 am
  10. Oh but COME ON Tony- He SAVED the auto industry! <>


    Posted by Frugalistablog | May 12, 2012, 6:24 am

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