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Fiction, Humor, politics, satire, writing

DARTH VADER: “I AM INSULTED…AND I TAKE UMBRAGE”

A spokesperson for Darth Vader said today, “Mr. Vader is deeply saddened by any, and all, comparisons between him and Dick Cheney.”

Dick Cheney

Dick Cheney (Photo credit: Talk Radio News Service)

She went on to say, “Mr. Vader killed approximately 215 people, give or take another 20 or so, including some Jedis, and, yes – he killed Obi-wan Kenobi, Padme’, The Emperor, some Battle Droids and Super battle Droids, Captain Antilles,
and  some imperial officers…that’s it! Unlike Mr. Cheney, he did not, however, preside over an undeclared, immoral, illegal, war which caused the deaths of over 100,000 innocent men, women, and children, against a
country proven to have nothing to do with 9/11, and which was, to all intents and purposes, bombed back to the Stone Age.

David Prowse as Darth Vader in The Empire Stri...

David Prowse as Darth Vader in The Empire Strikes Back (1980) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

She added: Nor did Mr. Vader preside over an administration which single-handedly destroyed the world’s economy as did Mr. Cheney and his front-man George W. Bush.”

These comments came in light of the memoir written by Mr. Cheney which offers no apologies, and instead seems to brag about his cherry-picking intelligence in making the case to go to war against Iraq, and his actions vis-à-vis the torture taking place at Guantanamo Bay Naval base.

As for Hurricane Katrina, Mr. Cheney praises President Bush for “personally” dedicating “hundreds of hours not only to ensuring an effective federal response but to reaching out to people who needed to know that their government cared
about them.”

Said Mr. Vader “it is an insult, and really hurts my heart,
to be linked in the same sentence with this war criminal,” he went on to say about Cheney’s book, “I should now consider writing a book about what an honorable nice guy I am also.”

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

14 thoughts on “DARTH VADER: “I AM INSULTED…AND I TAKE UMBRAGE”

  1. The Emperor denies he trained Cheney.

    Like

    Posted by Valentine Logar | November 17, 2013, 4:17 am
  2. Was just insulting Cheney at the dinner table yesterday. Alone, that sick narcissistic fuck represents the scariest thing oozing slime on planet Earth since his manipulation of the stings attached to George ‘My friends call me Pinocchio but you can call me Johnson’ Bush.
    I am SO glad Mr Vader took umbrage. For a moment there I saw ‘umbrella.’ The thought of Americans having no protection to cover themselves from the tears of real evil saddened me.

    Good work as always Tony
    xo

    Like

    Posted by The Deranged Miss R | November 16, 2013, 1:34 pm
  3. Does this mean the Bush is Vader’s son then, and not George Sr’s?

    Like

    Posted by Michelle | November 15, 2013, 8:44 am
  4. Well said….

    Like

    Posted by A Pondering Mind | November 15, 2013, 4:50 am
  5. ‘And I’ve got a big red light sabre. What’s Cheney got, huh?,…

    Like

    Posted by the urban misanthropist | November 15, 2013, 12:35 am

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