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Exclusive Report; the Real Trayvon Martin Uncovered

Fox News revealed just minutes ago that Trayvon Martin was a double agent for an as yet unnamed country in either the west or east….or maybe even the Middle East.

Fox Real Time logo on Fox News Channel''

Fox Real Time logo on Fox News Channel'' (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

As ace Fox anchor Bill O’Reilly reports, “It has been discovered by our sources that allegedly George Zimmerman knew that Mr. Martin was probably a dangerous double agent, knew he was a possible threat to our very existence as a country, and had been following him for months. The other country involved besides the aforementioned unnamed country was another unnamed country, where Trayvon Martin was indoctrinated and taught the fine arts of spying. Our source – who, you understand, must remain anonymous, also told us that Mr. Martin had once visited a tattoo parlor, and had a closet full of hoodies.”

Fox reports that Mr. Martin “spoke seven languages and could spy in each one of them.” O’Reilly added that ‘”we have undisputed, incontrovertible, evidence – which, of course is under lock and key owing to it’s sensitive nature, and the fact that we here at Fox News do wish to take the feelings of the Martin family into consideration on this – but evidence that we think just may point to perhaps a distinct possibility that there might be a chance Mr. Martin maybe could have been acting as a possible undercover proxy agent for an as yet to be named alleged person of interest.’ Then, looking quite serious, he stared into the camera and said; “I’ll have all these incredibly unbelievable facts after this word from our sponsors.”

Sean Hannity also reported that Mr. Martin was “obsessed with that Commie feng shui and loved moving furniture around in people’s homes.” Hannity added “If I ever caught anyone, let alone a Commie Pinko, fenging – or shuiing – in my house it…” and here he paused dramatically, “… it would be… not good – as my boyfriend would be so upset.”

Later tonight the Fox TV special “George Zimmerman – Misunderstood Martyr: The Director’s Cut” hosted by Ann Coulter, will be aired in its entirety, including the never before seen footage shot during George’s time working with Mother Teresa in Africa.

THIS JUST IN: Fox News has learned that Trayvon Martin possibly could even have been a Triple Agent! Maybe.

 

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012]. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

25 thoughts on “Exclusive Report; the Real Trayvon Martin Uncovered

  1. I just knew it was a mistake to cancel my subscription to faux news and the sun….damnit

    Like

    Posted by valentine logar | April 1, 2012, 3:34 pm
  2. Jeez…. the stuff you miss when you don’t watch Fox.

    Like

    Posted by kitchenmudge | April 1, 2012, 5:06 am
  3. Oh and despite your kind words towards FUX you’ve started a video binge on that commie seal loving Aussie-marrying bastage Ben Folds!

    Like

    Posted by Rachael Black | March 31, 2012, 4:58 am
  4. Thanks! I was waiting for the real story to come out. I mean, there is no way that Zimmerman could have just stalked that boy because he didn’t like his “looks” and just shoot him for no other reason. Impossible. This is a MUCH better explanation. Thanks again!

    Like

    Posted by She speaks.... | March 31, 2012, 2:41 am
  5. George Zimmerman: giving morons everywhere a reason to unite.
    Can’t wait for the spin they put on him to make him a martyr for the Rpeublican Party come November.

    Like

    Posted by El Guapo | March 30, 2012, 1:12 pm
  6. You said it..yes he could have been an agent double crossing every country and planet but do you know he was an agent of the alien species from the galazy hooded?

    Like

    Posted by Soma Mukherjee | March 30, 2012, 6:44 am
  7. Nothing like Fox News looking at the world through rose colored glasses. go on…

    p.s. what would we do without Fox News? just wondering

    Like

    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | March 29, 2012, 11:05 pm
  8. See..the one day i completely ignore that flat screen in the breakroom at work that SCREAMS Fox from sunup to sunset I miss the breaking news.. Guess I’ll have to catch Nancy grace for the wrap-up..
    You are priceless in your writing!!

    Like

    Posted by free penny press | March 29, 2012, 8:01 pm
  9. FINALLY! Fair and Unbalanced reporting on this travesty of a travesty (*citation needed).
    Only the genius of Fux News would be brave enough to assign such a volatile story to their finest of reporters.

    Tony, I and millions of uneducated Americans are grateful that your keen eye and ear have brought this continuing story to the forefront.
    From this moment on we here at YoYo-Dyne will no longer allow Skittles in the vending machine, hoodies on any employe and/or visitor to the company (oh and we WILL search all employees homes for such contraband) and throw all of our lobbyist weight, er, personal weight, into this search for the real perpetrators.
    Personally, I believe it was a front for Castro’s regime, funded by domestic terrorists such as the ACLU, NAACP, Sierra Club and naturally The Illuminati, All fueled by the Jew-run media.

    Remember: Skittles don’t kill people, they just make it easier.

    Oh, and can hardly wait to see Skeletor’s TV Special. We’re stocking up on Bud and Cheeze
    Whiz for the block party being planned.

    Like

    Posted by Rachael Black | March 29, 2012, 5:47 pm
  10. Barking…you already know what I think about your writing prowess and skill…trying hard not to hit the rewind remote…just imagine well done well done well done…for keeping your peeps on our toes.

    Like

    Posted by jotsfromasmallapt | March 29, 2012, 5:06 pm
  11. And those Skittles the boy was holding….well, they could have been a bomb of some kind!!

    Like

    Posted by Nicole Marie | March 29, 2012, 4:41 pm
  12. Hmm….I can see why OReilly & the rest are concerned. After experiencing a teen son, I know teen boys are fully capable of taking over the world. They are smarter than us, faster, stronger….
    Those hoodies may have been rigged with all sorts of high-tech gadgetry for the devious purpose of music and internet access and who knows what kinds of shenanigans !

    Like

    Posted by MJ, Nonstepmom | March 29, 2012, 4:15 pm

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