//
you're reading...
Humor, NEWS, writing

BREAKING NEWS: GOD SAYS SHE DOES NOT KNOW THESE PEOPLE

God, through Her press office, today issued a statement from Her unknown vacation retreat somewhere in one of the Universes, stating: “I would like to make it abundantly clear that I have never met, or spoken with, either Ted Cruz, Rick Santorum, Ben Carson or, for that matter, this Ralph Reed person – nor do I wish to.

speaking at CPAC in Washington D.C. on Februar...

speaking at CPAC in Washington D.C. on February 10, 2011. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

From what I have heard they do not approve of some of my best work, i.e., the gay community, who I think add so much colour to an otherwise drab creation.”

She then added; “It would be a great shame to further elevate bigots such as these to any office, let alone that of The Presidency of The United States of America.”

And how dare they wave those stupid signs like i hate fags? I’ve a good mind to have my friend Clarence sue their sorry asses for defamation. It would be great fun watching Darrow eat them alive – but why on my green earth reveal myself to such moronic swine anyway? My wife agrees.

And if these so-called “Christians” ever came in contact with my hippie friend Jesus they’d crucify him all over again! These “evangelical” hatemongers almost make me regret creating people.

She then went back to rolling a doobie.

 

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Advertisements

About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

10 thoughts on “BREAKING NEWS: GOD SAYS SHE DOES NOT KNOW THESE PEOPLE

  1. Bravo!

    Like

    Posted by PiedType | December 5, 2015, 12:09 am
  2. Great words from Elizabeth Taylor, lovely…

    Like

    Posted by transtime | December 3, 2015, 11:06 pm
  3. Oh, I see.

    Like

    Posted by allthoughtswork | December 3, 2015, 6:54 pm
  4. Well, see, there’s your problem. If you’re female and not married to a man, celibate until he wants offspring, and busy in the kitchen, you have no voice with these people.

    God should just stick to her passive-aggressive method of communication with them: making Republicans ignorant and funny-looking.

    Like

    Posted by allthoughtswork | December 3, 2015, 3:57 pm

Thank you for reading, I appreciate your time. Kindly Leave a Comment...I Place a High Value on All the Comments of My Readers. Thank you.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: