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Ted Cruz

This tag is associated with 23 posts

LUCIFER OUTRAGED BY REMARK OF JOHN BOEHNER

Pond ‘O Puke, Hades – In a hastily assembled press conference today at his mansion by The Lake of Fire in Hell’s most exclusive gated community Pond ‘O Puke, and with his wife Ethel at his side, Lucifer, Lord of the underworld, angrily disavowed any suggestion that he was as evil as Ted Cruz. “I … Continue reading

THE BALLAD OF TED CRUZ

In 2013, freshman Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas said he had a plan to do something that seemed impossible. He could force President Obama to strip the funding from the landmark health-care law that had come to bear his name — Obamacare — by threatening to shut down the government. Ted Cruz Drunk on the … Continue reading

ANOTHER VIEW FROM THE TEA PARTY: INTELLIGENT FACTION (# 4 in the Satirical Series Emails from the Tea Party)

Contrary to the email you’ve received to date from various other less well-informed members of our great Tea Party, my wife and I are both educated, well-informed university graduates, (me; Oral Roberts University Law School, she; Liberty University Law School). As attorneys, highly educated people, and students of the Constitution of these United States, we … Continue reading

THE BALLAD OF “THE DONALD” or: BYE BYE MR. AMERICAN LIE

Oh Donald, you are our hero You would-be American Nero What you’ve done – it appears Is what we couldn’t – for years Reduce the Republican Party to zero   Yes, Donald you are the one We progressives all so hoped would come To prove the Right’s base is Like their leaders – all racist … Continue reading

SAINT RONNIE OF TAMPICO, WHO BEGAT W. – AND GROVER – AND RUSH – AND SARAH – AND MICHELE – AND TED – AND (GASP) DONALD…

As America mourns the passing of Nancy Reagan who, as every pundit tells us, was instrumental in the policies of her husband, let us reflect on how those policies helped destroy the middle class of this country and decimated one of the finest free University systems in America and the world. And, as long as … Continue reading

REPUBLICAN AIR FORCE BOMBS UNITED STATES AS RUTH BADER GINSBURG FUCKS SCALIA TO DEATH

New York Feb. 14 – Early yesterday morning – as Antonin Scalia was fucking Ruth Bader Ginsburg, whose plan it was to stick an amyl nitrate popper under his nose causing him to have a massive coronary as she fucked him to death – and it worked – anyway, earlier – in a concerted pre-dawn … Continue reading