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Cautionary tale, Humor, Presidential Politics, satire, writing

ANOTHER EMAIL FROM THE TEA PARTY – “PUZZLED” SECTION

I am a prowd Tea Party member from Mississippi and I will be prowdly casting my ballet for the grate Donald J Trump as the Prezident of the United States of America this fall in the elecshun for Prezident.

However I must say I am puzzeled by one thing Mr Trump keeps saying. And that is why does he want to get rid of ices? I have been enjoying ices espeshally in the hot wether ever since I was knee-high to a Mississippi mud pie. So I do not unnerstand what Mr Trump has aginst this wunnerful summer treet which keeps us cool to when it is hot and we need too be.

Mr Trump also says that the Muslin Obama and Hillery created ices??? What? I did not know this thing! I guess thare werent no ices before them both then if he says so becawse he is a man of truth and a pie-us religjus man to so he would not lie about this fact. And I have to wunder what people did in the summer to keep thare tungs cool becawse alls I know is my tung needs coolin in them hot summer days. Right?

This is the onliest thing I can kwarrel about with Mr Trump as I am almost serten my granddaddy Clydey Ray ate ices when he was a boy. I think. Tho I can be wrong and maybe I am if Mr Trump says that them too created ices so maybe granddaddy Clydey Ray didnt.

Also Mr Trump says that Hillery “lacks the stammina” to deal with ices?? SHE CANT EVEN LIFT A CUP OF ICES TO HER MOUTH??? Then tell me – pleese – all you liberel idiots out thare…how in holy hell can she ever be the prezidnt if she hasn’t got the strength to LIFT UP A PAPER CUP OF ICES??? DUH!

And the other thing is Mr Trump says thay created the vacuume??? My good lady and her mother before her were cleenin the house with the vacuume ever since I can recollect so I think I might have to kwarrel with Mr Trump on this small matter to. But this is the onliest thing I think he maybe has got a littel wrong. Every other thing he is right about – exceptin the vacuume. A Hoover it was.

As you can eesily tell I am a inteligent persin as is my friends and also we are verry religjus Christains and we will all be praying and voting for this grate man Mr Trump

Oh – also Mr Trump says that ices are barberians?? This must be one of his sarcastics – I mean, how can a frozen treat cut hair?

Arvel Ray Gorse

Pearl, Mississippi

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

 

 

 

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About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

8 thoughts on “ANOTHER EMAIL FROM THE TEA PARTY – “PUZZLED” SECTION

  1. Great job, and funny…

    Like

    Posted by A Pondering Mind | August 16, 2016, 4:39 pm
  2. Reblogged this on A Pondering Mind and commented:
    This post is good for some laughs…

    Like

    Posted by A Pondering Mind | August 16, 2016, 4:38 pm
  3. Thanks for making me laugh, Tony. I needed that.

    Like

    Posted by Sparks In Shadow | August 16, 2016, 3:36 pm
  4. This beautiful, eloquent letter persuaded me. We can’t let Crooked Hillary take the white house!

    Like

    Posted by freefootballscholarships | August 16, 2016, 12:48 pm

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