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Cautionary tale, conjecture, not funny., satire

INSIDE DONALD TRUMP’S MIND AS HE NAMES PENCE TO COORDINATE GOV’T RESPONSE TO CORONAVIRUS ON TV

“Shit, this fucking dumb virus thing could cost me the fucking election…unbelievable…the market was way the fuck up…all my people were rolling in money and now…what a crap sandwich…why do these fucking things always happen to me?…

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“Coronafuckingvirus…What a fucking lousy break…I shoulda worn the red tie”

…These fucking asshole countries…China…who gives a fuck if some Chinks die?…lousy pieces of…There’s too many of them anyway…I can’t believe my shitty luck…I had it all going and then some germy yellow assholes screw me…Couldn’t this fucking thing wait ’til after the election? What bullshit..

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“Yeah, this religious nutjob is gonna fix it…sure…”

So what if some fucking people die…who gives a fuck…Yeah, steak tonight…idiot chef better make it really well-done…And they ran outta ketchup last time…Who runs outta ketchup?…All idiots…I’m surrounded by idiots.

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…I should also put Don on this…Or Jared…Maybe Ivanka…She could do some P.R…Shake her cute little ass at’em…Yeah, that’ll help cool things down…Good idea Trump…They think this’ll get me? Yeah sure…Fucking media, making a big deal outta this bullshit…They hate me, fucking lefty scum…I am a king, they are nothing! Nothing! Who gives a shit what the media thin—Well, not Fox…Thank God for Fox…They’ll tell these morons in bumfuck wherever what’s what…Keep them in line…Thank God for these suckers…A fucking virus of all things…Couldn’t touch me on the Russia thing…Which reminds me; I gotta call Vlad…See how he’s handling this dumb bullshit…

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“…A fucking virus…just my shitty luck…”

What a crock of shit…People are dying?…So fucking what?…Not that many anyway…And what do they contribute to the world? What? Nothing! That’s what…Nothing! Not like me. I’m smart…I lead…I’m a leader…A great leader…I AM a stable genius. And a fucking shit-assed virus? I still got a good shot if they run that old kike Bernie… A fucking Castro loving commie…We can fucking paint him red up and down…An’ he just had a heart attack to boot…This virus ain’t gonna get me. Let ’em all die…It’s like that nigga bitch sang that night at Studio 54…I will survive! And now I have to worry about that other old Jew bastard Bloomberg too…what a fucking mess. Why should I have to deal with this shit?

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…This virus thing is gonna kill me…

…I’ll hold a bunch of rallies and tell all these morons everything’s alright. That’ll do it…They believe everything I tell ’em…I’ll blame it on the Democrats…Nancy…Chuck…shifty Schiff…I’ll tell’em we’re way ahead of the curve when it comes to this crap…Some bullshit like that…I’ll tell ’em the do nothing Democrats caused this and that the virus was spreading very slowly in the U.S. because I was smart to close our border…Ooh, now they’ll let me build my wall…This could be good…This could be very good…

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2020. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

2 thoughts on “INSIDE DONALD TRUMP’S MIND AS HE NAMES PENCE TO COORDINATE GOV’T RESPONSE TO CORONAVIRUS ON TV

  1. The old saying “Give a man enough rope and he’ll hang himself” may finally be catching up to the Donald — and it’s a good thing, because the Dems can’t seem to get their act together, and it may take events beyond his control to help bring his despicable reign to an end.

    Like

    Posted by mistermuse | February 28, 2020, 9:35 pm

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