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Cautionary tale, commentary, poem of a sort

The Ballad of Rick Santorum or: Be Afraid – Be Very, Very, Very, Very, Very… Afraid

, U.S. Senator from Pennsylvania.

Image via Wikipedia

Slimier than Newt, oilier than Mitt

This is one self-righteous narrow-minded piece of shit

He lies right to your face

Though it’s right there on the tape

The scariest person in this race

Is Rick Santorum – here’s the case:

 

Women’s choice? There’s nothing badder

Rape or incest – doesn’t matter

Rick is there something in your Bible

Harkens back to something tribal

When a woman was just chattel

Any way you can begat’ll

Be okay – say, rape or incest

Take that infant to her thin breast

Make her be that baby’s mother

Tho’ that sweet child be her brother?

Is there?

 

Is this how you see things Ricky?

Sorry if I’m sort of prickly

On this subject I’ve opinions

Square against you and your minions

No one minds you’re all so pious

It’s just the bullshit you run by us

Does scare.

 

Pick a country – should he hate ‘em

He’s all for we just invade ‘em

(Among our Ricky’s other plans

He thinks we should bomb Iran!)

His worldview’s a catechism

Wants to teach creationism

(Hey it’s fine to be devout

But please just don’t go on about

No stem cells just ‘cause you’re not for ‘em

Did God tell you that Santorum?

Did She?

 

Wants his nose in every bed

It’s his business if gays wed

And global warming’s just a hoax

Just some lab geeks playing jokes

Lest all these things be misconstrued

He’s one scary dangerous dude

A real live eighteenth century man

He’s Ricky – our own Taliban

Wants his beak in all our business

As his God is his true witness

Not our God – just his and Perry’s

(She took sides in these primaries?)

Really?

 

“I believe in income inequality”

His real quote – his real philosophy

His kind of “Christian” who, of course,

Says “I’ve got mine – now you get yours”

To vote for him begs lots of questions

Like; pray tell – how much congestion

Is up there inside your head

Who ties your shoes – who makes your bed?

Huh? – Jeez…

 

Thinks life begins upon erection

Or necking in “that” movie section

(I think his mind is “Catholic” scarred

A nursing mom can get him hard)

What a president he’d make

I so hope not – for all our sake

Hey Ricky – you should live in peace

Leave us alone – become a priest.

Puh-leeze.

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of  this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

18 thoughts on “The Ballad of Rick Santorum or: Be Afraid – Be Very, Very, Very, Very, Very… Afraid

  1. Tony, when you make a comment on mine, there should be a button underneath the comment box for “Notify me of follow-ups” for “Notify me of new posts”. Or, check the WP blog dashboard, and tell it to email you new posts.
    My wp gives me that problem all. the. time.

    Like

    Posted by El Guapo | January 9, 2012, 3:34 am
  2. He wants ’em born, just doesn’t want to do anything to help ’em once they’re here.
    Think I’ll try and run off some rhymes for ass-bag and douche canoe.

    Sad thing is, if he gets anywehre at all, it won;t be She’s fault. It’ll be ours.

    Like

    Posted by El Guapo | January 7, 2012, 5:58 am
  3. He’s a walking, talking human shit bag!

    Like

    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | January 7, 2012, 3:20 am
  4. Seriously, this guy is a total nutcase. My hope is that now that he’s a ‘front runner’, he’ll get Cainified – you know, all of his shit will come out of hiding and hit the fan???

    🙂 Sometimes I picture you in my head, while you’re writing these pieces. Do you get mad as hell or laugh? I would totally be giggling!!!

    Like

    Posted by Janece | January 7, 2012, 12:26 am
  5. As always your poetry makes an amusing yet cutting point. Mentioned in a comment yesterday that he’s the scariest of all.
    Totally dug your lines:
    ‘When a woman was just chattel
    Any way you can begat’ll’ and
    ‘Did God tell you that Santorum?
    Did She?’

    Keep them coming Tony. Your style and knowledge make me look forward to all of your posts.

    Like

    Posted by Rachael Black | January 6, 2012, 9:31 am
  6. LMAOP!!!! Your Ballads are the BEST! Thanks!!!! 😀

    Like

    Posted by She speaks.... | January 6, 2012, 3:31 am
  7. Huh. Income inequality sounds good to this guy? Sounds like his religious background has made him an enormously empathetic individual, the kind the 1% needs in all areas of the government. His heart is so open to their needs and difficulties that, well, I’m getting choked up just thinking about it.

    I inadvertently began my day with Michael Moore’s “Capitalism, A Love Story.” Couldn’t look away. I’m still in shock, but I don’t know why. I’ll pretty much believe anything these days.

    Like

    Posted by Sparks In Shadow | January 6, 2012, 3:27 am

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Pingback: Sunday Morning Message …For the Instruction of Rick Santorum | GoodOleWoody's Blog - January 8, 2012

  2. Pingback: RICK SANTORUM WANTS TO IMPOSE HIS PERSONAL AGENDA ON AMERICA AND THINKS HE HAS THAT RIGHT. WHAT’S NEXT, RICK? TAKE OVER THE WORLD? | GoodOleWoody's Blog - January 6, 2012

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