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God Holds Press Conference

IMG_2735

IMG_2735 (Photo credit: WCHI News)

In Her first press conference since She labeled Mitt Romney “a Mormon without the second m,” God today said that She deliberately brought Hurricane Isaac to Florida to delay the Republican Convention because “I do not like mean, small minded, selfish, holier-than-thou racists, who hide behind symbols like biblical fairy tales and flags to cover their complete lack of concern for anybody other than themselves. How these most base, least logical, most self-righteous, and most stupid, of all of my earth’s creatures weaseled their way into my creation is beyond me. My wife LaKeesha and I are continually disgusted by their complete lack of empathy for any of the other life forms that inhabit the earth, and by their total disregard for the health of this beautiful planet, or for any    scientific fact – which, ironically, scientifically proves they are all  morons.” She then went back to fooling around with LaKeesha – and their new strap-on.

 

© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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About barkinginthedark

Tony Powers is a writer/actor/musician. His full bio may be seen by clicking on the picture, and then clicking on either of the 2 boxes below it.

Discussion

19 thoughts on “God Holds Press Conference

  1. You sound like one a them pot-smokin’ hippies who would deny obvious facts, such as that a woman who is a rape victim is less likely to conceive because her body is going to put up some sort of natural defense against it.

    Like

    Posted by trailertrashdeluxe | August 30, 2012, 8:20 pm
  2. The prodigal son returns, with his classic wit and seriousness.

    Like they say, Mother Nature has its way of warning and paying back.

    Its great to read your stuff, and good luck with the score.

    Like

    Posted by Don in Massachusetts | August 27, 2012, 10:17 am
  3. Excellent! Well said!
    I have only one question – if she knows all that was, is and will be, how exactly is it a “new” strapon?

    Other than that, brilliant, and great to see you, Tony. Hope all is going well.

    Like

    Posted by El Guapo | August 27, 2012, 9:54 am
  4. I think they used tapeworms. They wrapped themselves around another, less dangerous parasite and sneaked into creation that way…

    Like

    Posted by the urban misanthropist | August 27, 2012, 5:41 am
  5. Standing on seat, jumping up and down screaming “more more more”

    Like

    Posted by Valentine Logar | August 27, 2012, 3:27 am
  6. I love it! God is everything the GOP hates – excellent!!!! I’ve so missed you, Tony. I hope you return soon to stay.

    Like

    Posted by Michelle at Motley News | August 26, 2012, 11:23 pm
  7. Bravo! Bravo! Encore….

    Like

    Posted by jotsfromasmallapt | August 26, 2012, 9:24 pm
  8. *Clap* *Clap* *Clap*

    Bravo!

    Like

    Posted by k8edid | August 26, 2012, 7:06 pm
  9. I think this is supposed to be satire, but I can’t tell which political side you’re attacking.

    Like

    Posted by Kurt | August 26, 2012, 4:26 pm

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Pingback: On This Day of Remembrance We Must Never Forget… « Barking In The Dark - September 11, 2012

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