In Her first press conference since She labeled Mitt Romney “a Mormon without the second m,” God today said that She deliberately brought Hurricane Isaac to Florida to delay the Republican Convention because “I do not like mean, small minded, selfish, holier-than-thou racists, who hide behind symbols like biblical fairy tales and flags to cover their complete lack of concern for anybody other than themselves. How these most base, least logical, most self-righteous, and most stupid, of all of my earth’s creatures weaseled their way into my creation is beyond me. My wife LaKeesha and I are continually disgusted by their complete lack of empathy for any of the other life forms that inhabit the earth, and by their total disregard for the health of this beautiful planet, or for any scientific fact – which, ironically, scientifically proves they are all morons.” She then went back to fooling around with LaKeesha – and their new strap-on.
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