Attorneys for God today filed a mega-billion dollar lawsuit against Donald Trump and various co- defendants.
The suit alleges slander, libel, defamation of character, endangering one’s health – and well-being – and causing painful and prolonged agita.
Besides Mr. Trump, the additional co-defendants named in the suit are; The Republican Party, The RNC, the Republicans in Congress, the immediate Trump family, the delegations and attendees at the Republican Party convention in Cleveland, Ohio, all the Republican super PACS – and Fox News, their on-air anchors and its affiliates.
Reached at Her vacation home in the multi-universes God’s many voices said: “to hear My name come out of the mouths of these bigoted criminals, these hypocrites, made Me cry and made Me nauseous – to say the least, all at the same time. I can’t remember the last time Girlfriend had to hold My hair back as I knelt before the porcelain God…well, actually I do…George W. Bush and Dick Cheney.” She gagged as She ran off.
After throwing up yet again She returned to Her beach chair and continued; “It is an insult to all that I am to hear My name invoked as a means of validating the horrible ideas of these poor excuses for the beings I created. It makes Me sad, and sorry, that I ever gave them life. These people, and their ilk, now and down through the ages, have perverted the idea of what it means to be human.”
I am especially incensed by these jokers who have the chutzpah call themselves the religious right? Excusez Moi? To Me they are the religious wrong. They profess their love for Me and yet support a xenophobic, womanizing, amoral, egotistical, self-serving, narcissistic liar – and they do so without any shame, any irony, any thought to what that says about their so-called Christian values. Me almighty – gimme a break!
And, Me help Me if I ever make this kind of a creative choice again!”
She took another sip of her Mai-Tai and continued as the woman she endearingly calls “Girlfriend,” Her long-time life partner Shaniqua Maria Gomez lovingly applied sun block to Her back; “I still haven’t gotten over the fact that this ugly clown’s miserable spawn go to Africa to kill some of My most precious creations. In hindsight these people make Me think I might have been better off just stopping the whole creating thing at animals.
Also, I have never seen My dear friend Jesus, who has heard his name taken in vain more times than I can count and, unlike this Trump asshole you can believe Me, I can count up to forever. Anyway, Jesus – who enjoys a few tokes every now and then and hardly ever gets too upset about anything – never, never have I seen him so angry as he becomes when hearing his name come out of the mouths of these horrible excuses for piety. True piety doesn’t insist – or put itself on parade.”
She rubbed some sun block on Shaniqua’s back as She continued; “And, I have to add that every time Girlfriend and I see Bill Maher liken this orange buffoon Trump putz to an Orangutan we wince. This is a terrible insult to noble Orangutans everywhere. Terrible! And he’s an animal lover yet.”
And now, because of Debbie Wasserman Schultz’ blatant and stupid power play, the Bernie supporters, unlike the shameless Religious Wrong hypocrites who fell meekly in line to this amoral bad joke of a con man, will, in many cases, refuse on principle – because they possess such a thing – to back Hillary. Which could get this ignorant braggart Trump elected. What a mess.”
God’s attorneys wanted everyone to know that God, who can be somewhat vindictive at times, said; “I plan to take these sorry excuses for humans – these hate-filled Republican human stains, the ones who do not have children of course – with the exception of the Trump family – I’m going to enjoy taking them all for every last penny they have, every last thing they own, and use the entire vast amount of these ill-gotten monies and things to build affordable housing for poor and low-income people all over the planet…something Donald Trump, the, pardon My expression, “builder,” has never done – and worse – has never even thought of doing.”
© tony powers and Barking in the Dark, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to tony powers and Barking in the Dark with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.